A Pro Tip For Growing Your Self Confidence

I see you working hard on that self acceptance girl. If you’re feeling stuck or want a boost, here’s a tip.

Tell me if any variation of these scenarios feel familiar:

• Your fitness instructor just called you out in front of the whole class and made you feel incapable.

• Your boss just made you feel like you’re failing with that one subtle comment.

• Your barista just gave you a judgey ass look because of what you’re wearing.

• Your mom is being so critical of your life choices right now.
  

Yeah? Maybe? Cool.

Here’s a magic nugget for your consideration:

The areas where you feel you are being rejected, criticized or judged by others — anyone! — are precisely the places that you are rejecting or judging YOURSELF.

What YOU fully own, stand behind and compassionately accept about YOU can rarely get used against you.

In other words: You rejected that part of you FIRST— not your barista, boss or mom.

It’s all on you, babe.

THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE

So next time you feel like you just got side eyed, judged, made to feel less than, or flat out rejected in any way, ask yourself this:

How did I just judge/reject MYSELF here, and what can *I* do to be more accepting, loving or secure in this?

When you start to learn how to do this work for YASELF, there’s not much anyone can do to make you feel inferior. (Including, ironically, yourself).

And THAT is when the real freedom and power of self acceptance begins.

3 Ways to Feel Better About Where You Are Right Now -- Even If Its Far From Where You Want to Be

If you’re looking for a pickmeup or fast way to feel great about where you are right now, peep these three easy tips.

ONE: Instead of thinking of the thousand things you want to accomplish as daunting, overwhelming and disappointingly far away, get excited that all that goodness is out there and even available to you at all!

Get pumped that these options even exist. You don’t *have* to do those things, you GET to do those things.

Move from overwhelm to opportunity, from problems to possibility. #abundantaf

TWO: Take some time every so often to take your eyes off the road ahead and glance back behind you.

I bet you’ve come a loooonggg way from where you started. Even if you’ve taken a few steps back. Even if you still have light years to go. Even if your metrics of “success” have changed entirely!

I know in some ways, big or small, you’ve grown, have learned, or have accomplished something you’re proud of. Let yourself notice (revel in!) that.

Switch your Yeah Buts to FUCK YESes. Give yourself the recognition you deserve.

THREE: Remember that you’re right where you’re supposed to be. We all need (need!) every single step on the winding, brutal, beautiful paths we walk.

Even the ones that hurt, the ones you think you should have done better, and the ones that keep appearing over and over.

You can’t skip steps. You’re not behind. You’re not on the wrong path. You are right on track and getting perfectly primed to be able to rock the shit out of what’s coming your way next. And:

No matter how it may feel from your vantage point, the steps are *always* set up FOR you, not against you. Trust.

Then go back to number 1, and lather rinse repeat, as needed.

Summer Favorites 2020: The Eco Edition

Yes: most of us are still emotionally processing March, but believe it or not, summer is here.

My husband and I have been working to really hard to reduce our plastic use and overall waste for sometime now, and so I wanted to create a post that was solely around some of my favorite eco-friendly products.

Now: this conversation exists on a spectrum, and if we were all being truly sustainable af, we would all make all of these things ourselves to stop buying anything that’s mass produced in a factory, shipped across the country (or overseas) to us, and so on. I see that, and also acknowledge that many of these are linked through Amazon, which is not exactly the ideal when it comes to sustainable brands.

That said, if you are:

• looking for a place to start

• want to cut back on your plastic use and/or your overall waste like we were

• want some accessible swaps or improvements on the plastic and wasteful standards that most households have—

these are my favorites that I use and that I recommend.

(I had been planning to share this anyway, and just today found out that July is #plasticfreejuly ? Fitting.)

Let’s get into it!

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KITCHEN + CLEANING

Compostable, non-plastic sponges

Yes: I did include this in my last Favorites round up, but these compostable, all-biodegradable sponges are back, and for good reason: I love them.

They are as sturdy and durable as the sponges you know and love, they don’t smell or do anything weird, AND the extra bonus is they are packaged and shipped 100% plastic free as well.

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Tru Earth Laundry Detergent Strips

I was skeptical about these at first but they actually are awesome.

They come in cardboard packaging (no plastic) and you just drop a strip or two into your washer and they work great!

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Sponge Cloths

When I realized I was going through way more paper towel than I wanted to be during the day, I was excited to find these compostable, reusable alternatives.

These are a hybrid between a sponge and a towel (think eco version of a ShamWow) that is great for counter wipe downs, spills, cleaning surfaces & more.

They’re reusable (just toss in your dishwasher or washing machine) for up to 50 washes (I think!), and you just toss in the compost at the end of their life.

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Un-Paper Towels

Between the sponge cloths above and these, I rarely use paper towel for anything anymore, which has cut down on so much waste.

These are just simple cotton cloths that you can throw in the wash, that are SO much more absorbent than pretty tea towels and are great for keeping hands clean as you cook. I am obsessed with these things and highly recommend!

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Branch Basics Household Cleaning

There’s lots of options out there when it comes to eo-friendly cleaning supplies, but this has been my personal go-to for a while. Branch Basics sent this set out to me to try I think TWO YEARS ago, and I am STILL using it. All the time.

The bottles are plastic (con), but they are reusable, refillable, and last so long, AND negate your need to purchase any other extra plastic cleaning products (pro), making this such an awesome option for anyone looking for an upgrade in their household cleaning regimen.

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FOOD + DRINK

Metal Straws

Ages ago I started getting in the habit of drinking coffee with a straw, even when hot, hoping it would help with not staining my teeth as much.

I had been using compostable straws for a while but recently upgraded to these guys to cut down on waste and I love them.

They are packaged plastic-free, are dishwasher safe, come with little cleaner brushes, and are durable AF.

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Wax Food Wraps

These are all natural, plastic free, reusable alternatives to plastic wrap.

While they don’t do everything (like a super tight seal you need to store an onion, for example), they are usable for just about everything else.

We have one set that has 3 sizes and find them effective, durable, and most importantly: have helped cut down our use of plastic wrap.

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Silicone Stasher Bags

These silicone Stasher bags are the reusable and more sustainable alternative to ziplocks. They come in varying sizes, are dishwasher safe, can be used to cook (sous vide, anyone?), are non-toxic, and super versatile.

Grab them of cooking, storing, freezing, traveling, or anything at all!

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Soda Stream

True story: I used to PLOW through La Croix.

I know I shared this is in my last Favorites here, but I’m sharing it again because it really has become one of my favorite kitchen gadgets.

This bad boy makes my sparkling water habit nearly waste-free.

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BEAUTY + BATHROOM

Primally Pure Face Oil

This face oil from Primally Pure is one of my favorites. I will wear it as a treatment while I soak in the bath, in lieu of night cream, as a super hydrating moisturizer, and in all sorts of nourishing ways.

It comes in a glass bottle, is all natural, and generally just a great company too. They make lots of skincare products that are worth checking out! This is one of my faves.

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Bamboo Toothbrushes

I recently read that every single piece of plastic ever made still exists, and that line has highlighted the amount of plastic we use and throw away, that’s sitting in a landfill somewhere.

A small but effective help to this endless mound of plastic is toothbrushes, so I was happy to give these ones a go. And so far? 10/10.

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David’s Toothpaste

Another huge culprit in the pile of landfill plastic: toothpaste tubes.

Though I haven’t tried this brand yet, it’s on my list. (Currently I am using toothpaste tablets that come in a glass jar, from Bite). But if you’re not feeling that adventurous yet but want a plastic-free alternative, try this.

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Shampoo Bar

Another place I’ve been dabbling with less-waste alternatives: shampoo & conditioner.

I have a bar shampoo & bar conditioner, and although I do not use them exclusively (yet), I am getting accustomed to them and would invite you to do the same.

Finding the right ones for your hair texture and needs can take a little trial and error, but this bar is highly rated on Amazon and might be a great place to start.

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Plaine Products Body Lotion

The daily shit we use that comes in plastic bottles we toss into a landfill, episode 974357.

This company has a range of bathroom products that all come in metal containers that are refillable for free.

I’ve been using this body lotion and quite like it. And if you’re not ready for shampoo bars yet but want to ditch the plastic, check this brand for their options as well.

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I have been using this floss and been loving it— not just because it comes in plastic-free packaging but because it gets the job done.

I will say that my husband isn’t in to this because this particular brand is a bit too think for his teeth, but I’d definitely invite you to give it a try or shop around for other natural plastic free floss!

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That's it! There will definitely be more from me on this topic here again, but for now, that’s some of my eco-friendly low to no waste and plastic free alternatives that I’m currently loving.

What are you loving these days? Anything out there I need to try? Let me know in the comments!

And remember that you can always check out my all-time favorites (read: ride or die, go-to products) and recommendations from everything from skincare to cookbooks in my shop tab!

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Disclaimer: this post may contain affiliate links, which help and allow me to run this blog, so I appreciate your support!

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Spring Favorites 2020: What I'm Loving Right Now

WELL.

It’s been a minute since we’ve done one of these style posts, eh? It’s not for lack of interest ok.

I’ve been a liiiiittle busy over here launching my new signature mentorship program, SHE THRIVES ACADEMY, and taking my first two waves of amazing women through the program.

But more on that later.

While the monthly favorites is a little tough for me to commit to right now, I think seasonal favorites might be a good compromise?

So. Without further ado, here are the things (from skincare to makeup to snacks, to books and beyond) that I’ve been loving lately!

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HOUSE + HOME

Compostable, non-plastic sponges

We have been REALLY trying to cut down on our use of plastic in this house, and I recently found these plastic-free sponges and have been really impressed with their performance.

They are as sturdy and durable as the sponges you know and love, they don’t smell or do anything weird, AND the extra bonus is they are packaged and shipped 100% plastic free as well.

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Friends Tea Towels

What’s not to like? Jam? Good. Beef? Good.

If you know, you know.

Yes you probably need these.

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Crystal Prisms

I recently hung one of these in my kitchen window and have been living IN RAINBOWS ever since. These beauties refract the light in such a lovely way and it’s just a nice little touch to have some dancing colors around the house on sunny days.

This set is less than 10 bucks and comes with two crystals, a polishing cloth and line to hang them.

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Rebounder

While I have been making my way back into the gym, I have been sticking to hypertrophy and staying away from heavy or high intensity cardio.

I decided this would be a fun thing to have at home that will allow me to get my lymphatic system moving without it being high impact, and I love having this around!

Especially if you work from home: this is a great way to break up your day and get your (creative) juices flowing, PLUS: how can you NOT smile while jumping on a trampoline?

P.S. I have been back on THE BIGNESS PROJECT program and its official: its still awesome.

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CLOTHING

Free People Cami

True story: I have this top in almost every color and I wear them all the time. I have been asked regularly on Instagram where these are from, and so I wanted to include them here!

These do not have any bra liner or support and I don’t wear anything under them, but they are so comfy without compromising cute. (Just don’t put them in the dryer or those tiny little straps will die).

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SKINCARE + MAKEUP

OLE HENRIKSEN Dark Spot Toner

To be honest I have really come to love this entire brand of skincare. This toner is one of my newer additions to my cabinet and I’ve been loving it.

It is designed to lighten up dark spots or discoloration, and has a subtle but noticeable zing on the skin.

I don’t use it every day, but I use it a couple times a week when I feel I could use a little extra pick-me-up.

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OLE HENRIKSEN Goodnight Glow Retin-ALT Sleeping Creme

Did I mention I love this brand?

This night cream has a naturally derived alternative to retinol, so if you have sensitive skin or are choosing to avoid retinol for any reason, this might be a good alternative for you to try.

This is definitely one of my favorite night creams I’ve tried and the first tub I have lasted ages! Time to re-up!

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Herbivore Prism Mask

If you’re looking for a great new mask, this is my newest addition and so far I have been loving it.

It gives your skin a quick hit of some glow-inducing acids and I mean the packaging makes it almost a decor item to your bathroom.

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CHARLOTTE TILBURY Hollywood Flawless Filter

Fam, lemme tell you: I am QUITE the connoisseur of glow products of every origin and variety. I live for this shit.

And this product right here might be one of my all time favorites.

This stuff is sort of like a liquid highlight and a foundation combined, and I use it almost every day: I put a TINY dab on each cheekbone, blend it in, and then apply concealer under my eyes and a brow, and poof- I’m done. And I look like I just drank 5 gallons of water. SHE IS HYDRATED + GLOWY OK.

10/10 recommend this stuff, and even though it’s pricey, it comes in a HUGE bottle that is sure to last you a while.

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P.S. Be sure to check out my all-time favorites and cabinet staples on this page here.

FOOD + DRINK

Soda Stream

Honestly the amount of La Croix I go through in a week (or… day) is something I will keep to myself, but suffice it to say, I realized that I REALLY did not want to be creating the amount of waste that I was by plowing through cans.

Enter: The soda stream. This guy is not only saving us $, but makes my sparkling water habit nearly waste-free.

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BETTER BITES Chocolate Chip Do Bites

Ok so even though I have some issues with their branding (can we lose it with the moral connotations when it comes to food please tysm), these are seriously my newest obsessions.

I keep mine in the fridge because I like my chocolate crunchy.

They have other flavors/styles and they all get my stamp of approval!

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Habanero Ranch Dressing

I put this shit on everything.

I mix it into salad dressing vinaigrettes, I dip pizza in it, I just think it’s the best.

I highly recommend!

(Also their Poppy Seed dressing is a delight)

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French Flour

Full gluten flour that doesn’t fuck me up. This French flour has been such a fun thing to find and I have been loving getting to make my own breads and baked goods and eat the REAL DEAL goodness.

Note: experiment with this at your own risk. Contains hella gluten. Not for those with Celiac.

P.S. I get asked all the time so gonna leave this here: My go-to bread recipe

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That's it! What are you loving these days? Anything out there I need to try? Let me know in the comments!

And remember that you can always check out my all-time favorites (read: ride or die, go-to products) and recommendations from everything from skincare to cookbooks in my shop tab!

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Disclaimer: this post may contain affiliate links, which help and allow me to run this blog, so I appreciate your support!

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The Weight You Need to Lose in Order to Truly Like Yourself

Answer me this: Do you believe that the thing standing between you and radical self love... is a few pounds?

While there is nothing (I repeat: NOTH.👏ING👏!) wrong with changing how your body looks, my question to you is this:

If we went deep— like deep deeeep down — is what you really want from a physique change... actually a FEELING?

My bet would be that it is. Cuz spoiler alert: everything we do is because we want to feel a certain way, period.

So. Is what you’re REALLY after confidence? Self love? Acceptance, an end to the inner war? To feel valuable, desired, worthy?

Do you dream that all those golden feels will arrive like the free gift with purchase once you hit your goal weight?

If so, hear this:

If what you’re REALLY seeking with a physique change is actually a FEELING — the physique you got now ain’t the problem, my love.

Real talk. How can you honestly expect to be hashtag blessed with the unconditional self love and self acceptance you’ve been pining for, if it’s only arriving to you via a fucking SIZE?

Isn’t that building your own self approval out of sand? Isn’t that inherently *conditional* love?

But I get it. We know that *something* has to change for our mindset to change (otherwise we’d be there already, right?), and in this culture, it’s par for the course to make our bodies bear that burden.

It’s not your fault for thinking that your body is the culprit in how you feel now, or the savior to how you WANT to feel later, or for thinking the two things are even related at all.

But I’ve got some news, and I say this with love:

The weight keeping you from radical self love? It’s NOT on your body.

THE WEIGHT YOU NEED TO LOSE IS:
The weight of your outdated internal narratives and limiting beliefs about who you are and what makes you good enough that you’ve been carrying around for years and informing your fears + motives that btw DON’T EVEN BELONG TO YOU.

Once you can shed THAT weight? You’re free.

And FUCK does it feel good.

For more on this, go listen to ep 64 of SHE THRIVES RADIO: CHANGING HOW YOU LOOK VS CHANGING HOW YOU FEEL, where I break it all down.

And hey: if this resonated with you, you might want to check out SHE THRIVES ACADEMY.

Stop Treating the Gym as Your 'Therapy'

Unpopular opinion:

No, fitness is not your “therapy”.

Before you come for me, hear me out.

🤔We demonize the act of diving head first into a tub of ice cream to cope with a shit day or soothe a case of the feels, but we celebrate the idea of hitting the gym for the same reasons.

We do this for several reasons, but the primary one is that when taken WITHOUT context, one of those outlets seems “healthier”.

But lest we forget: HEALTH IS CONTEXTUAL.

💁🏼‍♀️So let’s add that in just for funsies.

When you’re feeling less than great and looking for an outlet, both the ice cream and the gym are playing an IDENTICAL role, and this is important:

To distract, to avoid, to numb, or to otherwise appeal to your primal instinct to RUN from discomfort. When we do this, we tend to reach for something that will light up our reward centers FAST.

This comes in many flavors. Food. Booze. Scrolling. And yes, even fitness.

It gets all the Feel Goods flowing through your body and brain, acting as short term pleasure and reward.

And HEY. There is nothing inherently wrong with this! You are entitled to ALL the pleasure in the world my dear.

But. If you are using fitness as your sole release, soother, or escape, you are STILL running.

You are not letting yourself process. You are seeking fast reward (ice cream!), and in doing so, avoiding the REAL (uncomfortable) work that your mind and heart are telling you needs attention.

But isn’t a workout a better option than ice cream? Maybe. But maybe not. Again: context.

Are you are taking an already stressed body and piling more stress (exercise!) on top of it, over and over and over again?

This is when your workout can be actively working AGAINST your greater health, no matter how refreshing it feels in the moment.

So keep sweating and moving, but start tuning in to what is driving you.

If it’s because it’s an escape, I implore you to stop running and start showing up for the deeper work.

Whether that’s ACTUAL therapy, working with a coach (hi), or just letting yourself process fully, don’t forget that your emotional fitness counts too.

And it requires its OWN work.

For more on this, listen to episode 67 of SHE THRIVES RADIO, all about Emotional Fitness.

The Two Words That Can Dissolve Your Fear

I’ve been scared my whole life.

Scared of everything.

Scared of being left behind
Scared of being too much
Scared of not being enough
Scared of the unknown
Scared of certainty
Scared of strangers
Scared of the dark

All of it. Living in fear.

And yet in the face of all this fear, I’ve found myself quietly intoxicated by the enormous power of two simple words.

Two words that take the squeezing, tightening, isolating, angry pressure of fear, and split it open into a beaming expanse of light, warmth and possibility:

What If.

I’m afraid I’ll be left behind. What if my path was my own?

I’m afraid I am too much. What if this bigness allows someone else to be big too?

I’m afraid of not knowing what’s coming. What if it was exactly what I’ve been hoping for?

✨What if it all goes well?
✨What if I am enough?
✨What if I am strong enough to handle this?

Fear will always show you one side, and it does it well. It will paint it vividly, darkly.

Everything that can go wrong, every way you will fail, every way it will hurt, the way you will be left alone to pick up the pieces.

It will all go wrong.

But ‘what if’ begs you to consider an alternate ending. ‘What if’ helps you stand taller, even in the face of fear. ‘What if’ reminds you that there’s always another way.

⚡️What if it all goes RIGHT?

Whenever I find myself getting pulled back into the cold shadows of my fear, I hear the whisper of these two simple words and I let myself warm to their presence.

‘What if’ turns me into the light.

And it is towards this beacon, often distant and faint, that I take a step. And then another.

You see, my fear is my imagination. Turned against myself. My antidote to fear is my own imagination, turned in support of myself.

I may have been scared my whole life, but I’ve also been training this What If side of me to run wild. Turns out, it’s really all it takes.


If you feel stuck in fear’s confines, I hope you remember that there is a way out. There’s always another story available to you.

Your freedom may be as simple as two short words.

What If.

And I hope you let your imagination run wild. 💜

5 Simple Swaps to Live Healthier Instantly

NUMBER 1

SWAP OBSESSING OVER THOSE 10 LBS for 👉

Unpacking your —and our culture’s— implicit fatphobia and the way diet culture and beauty standards have encouraged your fear of weight gain and shaped your body image and your perception of worth.

NUMBER 2

TRADE THE SHOULD-BE-DOINGS for 👉

Activities, habits, and goals that actually align with and mean something to *you*, in your current season of life with your individual available resources, bandwidth, priorities + interests.

NUMBER 3

SWITCH THE EFFORT TO GET THE NUMBER ON THE SCALE AS LOW AS POSSIBLE with 👉

An effort to get as many adventures, smiles, and *life* out of your limited number of days as possible.

NUMBER 4

SWAP TRYING TO EAT 100% CLEAN for 👉

Eating foods that nourish you physically + emotionally, without the clean/dirty, good/bad, right/wrong moral connotations.

NUMBER 5

TRADE THE HUSTLE, GRIND, AND NO PAIN NO GAIN MINDSET for 👉

Rest, stress management, self care, fun, and fulfillment *outside* of the gym or kitchen.

AND HEY. If you want my help making any of these swaps, you’re in luck: this shit is *precisely* what I do. Head HERE + let’s get going NOW.

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So You Wanna Be a Coach? Here's How to Make it Happen

You’ve been so rocked by your fitness or nutrition changes that you’ve decided you want to start paying it forward and help other people achieve their goals, too.

Maybe you want it to be a side gig, maybe you’re fantasizing of quitting your day job and running an empire, maybe you’re currently a little somewhere in between.

First of all: congrats, this is awesome! 

The world always needs helpers and more people who are willing to guide others through the rugged terrain of life and deliver them successfully to the other side.

So where do you start? What do you need to do? How do you get clients? How do you know when you’re ready? How do you go from good to great?

Here are my best tips to get you moving.

BEFORE YOU START

BE A GOOD STUDENT

Yup that’s right. Just cuz you’re hoping to move to the other side of the table doesn’t mean that your learning days are over. The best teachers are ALSO the best students. Always growing, always evolving, always taking notes.

How coachable are you in the gym? How do you take criticism? How well do you take being wrong or losing?

Becoming a coachable student who is always eager to learn and better themselves is hands down the first step in learning how to teach others to do the same. If you’re not there yet, you’re not ready to teach.

For more on how to be a great student, listen to She Thrives Radio ep 22 | Best Practices for Athletes: How to be a Great Student

LEARN YOUR SHIT

Yea, you need to know some shit. But you don’t need to know everything. Way too many people get caught in a trap of thinking they need 29 degrees and certifications in order to start, and I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be like that!

Waiting until you get to the end of Knowledge Road to start helping people is not only silly, but oftentimes is actually just fear dressed up in disguise.

If you are even one step ahead of someone else on that road, and you are able to turn around and help them navigate it, why wouldn’t you do that?

Yes, certifications and knowing your stuff is important: especially in the health industry. Learn as much as you can, take whatever classes or certs that appeal to you, and soak it all up, but don’t get stuck thinking that you can’t do anything until you have letters after your name.

Plus, learning isn’t a one time deal, a certification program or a finish line you cross and then are done for good.

Learning never ends, and the best teachers are ALWAYS students, and the best coaches are always investing into coaches for themselves. Learning your shit is part of the process, not a prerequisite. 

SWERVE ON THAT DOGMA

When you’re first learning about your industry and niche and studying up on all the fine print, one of the things you are almost certain to find is a fuckton of dogmatic beliefs— especially so in nutrition and fitness. 

It can be hard to catch this when you’re a total noob and a sponge soaking up everyone’s expert theories and opinions, and you’ll be tempted to start regurgitating this dogma as fact, but I beg of you, please: keep your wits about you as you learn, and take most things with a grain of salt. (but wait isn’t salt bad? boom. that’s some dogma right there, son).

There’s more than one way to healthy, more than one path to fit. What worked for you may not work for another, so don’t get stuck in the one size fits all mentality to, well, ANY part of cultivating wellness.

WHEN YOU GET GOING

JUST START

You know your shit, you’re eager to start teaching, you know you can help. So when you do you know you’re really ready? Well that would be right this very moment, my dear. If you’re waiting for a sign, this is it.

For your internet business: Don’t get tied up in the bells and whistles like websites and branding colors and logos. Find a platform to share on just START.

For your IRL service: See if you have a friend or acquaintance who you be up for being your first client. Start talking to local gyms, shadowing, interning, and doing whatever it takes to start getting comfortable wearing the coach’s shoes.

SERVE, SERVE, SERVE

How do you actually start, you ask? First up: serve. Help. Deliver. Guide. Share. And yes— for free. 

If you’re asking “how do I make a bunch of money doing this” BEFORE you’re asking  “how can I help the people out there who need what I can teach them”, you’re not gonna get very far.

Before you can start rakin’ in the beaucoup bucks, we need to create a following of people who know, like, and trust you. Who know that what you teach works, who are excited to learn from you, and who generally like and connect with you as a person. These are the people who will likely be first in line when you actually have something to sell them.

Now— a lot of people all sorts of sweaty and stressed out about numbers and like counts. Don’t be that guy. You can be a wildly successful health coach with a teeny tiny audience— but only if you do it right.

And the right way, is to serve. Focus on what you can give, not what you can get.

And this isn’t just on your internet platforms, but also IRL. Find places to make an impact any and everywhere you can. Being a coach means you’re always a coach, not just when you’re speaking to a client. Make a difference. Be in service to others. The bonus? All of this sharing and helping is giving you tons of experience and ultimately makes you an even better coach.

COACH YOURSELF

Remember how being coachable was first on this list? Well, it ain’t over yet. Learning how to self-coach will become one of your best growth tools in your entire toolbox. 

When you’re having a shit day, when you’re feeling stuck, when you don’t know what to do next or how to more forward, when you’ve made a mistake, etc:

Start talking to yourself like you would talk to a client. What would you recommend someone do in this situation?

You are ALWAYS your first client. Get in the practice of coaching yourself through everything that you possibly can.

For more on how to be an amazing coach, listen to She Thrives Radio ep 23 | Best Practices for Coaches: How to be a Great Teacher

And a last little note:

When you’re hoping to become someone who helps, it’s important to be in touch with how YOU, personally, become better at receiving help.

Do you ask for help when you need it? Are you willing to learn a new or different way? Are you always on the hunt for ways improve and develop? Are you showing up in service for people around you on the regular? Do you invest in your own growth and betterment? Do you love seeing others succeed?

If so, you’re ready, and about to be one hell of a coach, girl.

WHAT’S NEXT?

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Skipping the Gym: Laziness or Listening to Your Body?

Psst: This was first shared exclusively with my VIP Club but I decided to share it publicly here as well, due to the overwhelming feedback I got from this email.

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On a recent podcast (episode 45) I spoke about self care tips for people who are busy AF, and one of the various tips I included in that episode was that skipping the gym can be self care.

I also made an Instagram post where I referenced this episode, building on this one sliver of the show, and since then, there have been a lot of questions popping up in our private Facebook group.

They're all a little bit different, but at their core, the common denominator is this question:

How can I tell if my desire to skip the gym is an excuse, or if it's self care?

Is it laziness, or is it listening to my body?

And this is SUCH a great question. So I wanted to offer my two cents to you today, er actually, my 3 different strategies for sizing up your urge for down time.

STRATEGY #1:

Here's a quick checklist to run through to see if taking an extra rest day, or two, or 25, is self care or nah:

• If you listen SUPER close to your gut you already know the answer is "rest"

• If you slept like shit last night, or the past few nights

• If you've been going harder than usual in the gym and dialing up your intensity

• If you've have a super stressful week at work

• If you have a nagging injury that won't quiet down

• If you've been exercising consistently 4-5 days a week for months or years

• If you get to the gym and begin working out and immediately feel like you don't want to do it

• If you've been busy AF in your personal life

• If you have a ton weighing on your mind right now

• If the idea of taking an extra rest day sends you into a panic:

You probably need to rest.

For more on how intense exercise compounds stress, listen to episode 37 of She Thrives Radio, all about Overtraining.

STRATEGY #2:

Take a quick shift in your perspective, and instead of worrying about this one extra rest day or two, get a bird's eye view:

In the grand scheme of this year, or your life, do you think this one rest day or week off will make a massive difference?

Is this a season where prioritizing a ton of exercise is of extreme value to you (like training for an upcoming meet)? Or are you working out for general health and wellbeing?

If it's the latter, an extra rest day or 5 is probably in order, ESPECIALLY when you can hear your body whispering that that's what it *actually* wants.

You might also like this blog post: In Defense of an Unbalanced Life: Why Something’s Gotta Give

STRATEGY #3:

Get real (like really RULLY real) with yourself about why taking an extra rest day is so difficult.

What do you fear will happen? How are you concerned it will impact you? How are you feeling about how it may appear to others? Dig in here. You might be shocked at what you find.

We're almost pressured by our current health-obsessed culture to move every single day, and if we don't, we feel like we've failed. But it just isn't that simple!


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If you have even an inkling that your body is saying it wants rest, don't ignore it.

Overriding your body's cues in order to maintain the status quo and do what your Instagram feed makes you believe you must do, is a recipe for trouble.

Feeling like you're being lazy or making excuses because you're skipping the gym ONE DAY is a byproduct of our current culture and conditioning, and it's simply not serving us.

Yes, physical exercise is amazing for our health in myriad ways. I'm not arguing that.

But if you are a healthy, regular gym goer who is taking part in super high intensity exercise on the regular, there absolutely IS a point of diminishing returns.

Don't be afraid to slow down, so that you can go hard when it counts. 

And always remember that while full-on rest is something you should REGULARLY be doing, trading the gym for a walk, yoga, or other low key exercise is just as helpful sometimes.

You're not being lazy or unhealthy by taking extra rest. You are showing up for yourself, listening for what you need, and honoring what you hear.

THAT, my friends, is what health, self care, and wellness is all about.
xo,

Taylor

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